Do I Have To Watch American Idol?
by Cat and Els
Summary: What happens when Ella dares Max to watch American Idol? Who will win the fight over who has the hottest girlfriend? Fang or Iggy? And who really is Simon Cowell? EXTREME OOC! FAX AND EGGY! NOT A ONE SHOT! READ IF YOU DARE! RnR!
1. Chapter 1

"**Do I have to watch American Idol?"**

**Max POV**

"Mom! Ella's trying to make us watch American Idol again! SAVE US!" I shouted from the living room.

Ella was forever trying to make us watch American Idol because the flock was convinced that it was a load of trash even if none of us had watched it. We had heard about it at the school we were forced to go to by Anne but still refused to watch it. We the freaking flock for God's sake, the world would end before any of us apart from Nudge, watched reality T.V.

"Ella, stop trying to make the Flock watch 'American Idol', or no cookies for a month!" Dr M replied.

"But Mo-" Ella stopped halfway through, and it was like a light bulb had gone off above her head…

"Max, I triple cookie dare you to watch American Idol with me for the whole of tonight." She smiled evilly,

"No freaking way, I'm Maximum Ride for crying out loud! How am I meant to save the world whilst watching that crap," I replied.

"**You must watch American Idol tonight Max" **the voice told me_,_

"Oh you can just shut up too…" I told the voice,

"See, Max even the voice thinks you should be watching American Idol, and that's saying something" I scowled at Ella, she just smirked and replied, "Is the little birdie feeling like a chicken?"

"Me, a chicken, I could kick your ass in three seconds flat…" I replied, then Ella started making chicken noises, and doing the chicken dance,

Oh no she didn't, then I LUNGED at her…

Iggy started cheering for Ella, but I had in her pinned down in three seconds flat,

Then Fang jumped up and said,

"Ha, my girl can kick more ass than yours,"

"Well at least my girlfriend isn't a mutant freak" Iggy replied,

"At least I can see how hot mine is, unlike some BLIND mutant freaks", Fang said whilst smirking,

"Hey" I butted in,

"Sorry, how beautiful she is!"

"Thank you Fangie" I giggled, "Now Ella"…

"Fangie" Iggy snorted

"Iggy-kins, come save me!" Ella begged,

"Anything for you Ellie-darling" he replied, doing a super man pose,

`Don't. You. Dare!" I snarled, Iggy gulped,

"Sorry Ellie-baby, can't mess with Maxie this time of the month",

"But Iggy-kins", Ella whined,

"Sorry, when Max is PMSing, the world is in danger, and I unfortunately all I can do is make it worse",

"Fangie kick his butt for me" I said giving him the bambi eyes, "I'm kinda busy over here"

"Anything for you Maxie…" Fang replied before lunging at Iggy and pinning him down,

"Fang I never knew you found me so attractive, I didn't know you swung that way", Iggy told Fang,

During this Gazzy and Angel had walked in after hearing all the noise. Then Fang punched Iggy in the nose, but Iggy used this opportunity to push Fang off him and stand up, then Fang pushed him self up of the floor and then they charged at each other, screaming like 2 year old girls,

"MY GIRLFRIEND IS HOTTER THAN YOURS!" Fang shrieked.

"NO SHE'S NOT! MY GIRLFRIEND'S HOTTER THAN YOURS!" Iggy screamed back.

"DOES YOUR GIRLFRIEND HAVE BATTLE SCARS ALL OVER HER BODY, AND A C CUP CHEST?"

"How do you know that?" Iggy asked, forgetting the fight, for a moment,

"Oh the wonders of an older woman!" Fang said dreamily,

Then I jumped off Ella, and shouted, "SHUT UP, YOU SEXIST PIGS, I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS! I'LL WATCH AMERICAN IDOL IF YOU BOTH JUST SHUT UP! THERE'S KIDS IN THE ROOM!"

Fang and Iggy looked around and shrugged their shoulders. Iggy pointed at Fang,

"I'm fine with it, just as long as I hear the full story later…"

I was fuming at this point with my mouth wide open. Ella sneaked up behind me and was about to kick me when I turned around and grabbed her leg so she couldn't. I punched her in the nose and turned to walk out.

"Max, I think my nose is broken," Ella said, blood pouring everywhere.

I turned back around. "Well you started it. Don't mess with Maximum Ride…"

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**A/N**

**So what did you guys think? Don't worry, there is more to come! Could we possibly have 5 reviews? Also check out our podcast - the links are on our profile!**

**We love you - Cat and Els xxxxx**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N - Sorry it took a while to update. We've been on holiday and stuff... But here's the next chapter :)**

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**Chapter 2**

Max POV

By now it had got to the evening after a whole day of sitting and sulking in my room. I knew that in a moment I would receive the dreadful call that I had been waiting for for hours.

"Max! It's time to watch American Idol! You promised!" Ella called from downstairs. Dammit...

I trudged downstairs reluctantly. Fang was there though which made it all better.

"Fangie!" I squealed as I jumped onto the sofa next to him and cuddled into his chest.

"Hey Max! So you've forgiven me for earlier then?..." Fang replied. I'd forgotten about that... Do I forgive him or not?

I decided and chucked a cushion at his head. "That's for earlier, but I forgive you... For now." I cuddled back up again.

Then Ella walked in. With a massive plaster over her nose. I guess I should've been expecting that... But I didn't feel guilty. She's the one who forced me to be watch this anyway...

Ella sat down. Probably because she didn't want me to re-break her nose.

Ella turned around. "So now, you, the supposedly great Maximum Ride, are sitting here at my command, about to watch American Idol?" she said. Maybe she did want me to re-break her nose...

"Our girls are fighting again. I bet you $50 Maxie wins," Fang said to Iggy.

"Really? Deal. Anyways Ella is totally hotter than Max," Iggy replied.

"I didn't do it at your command. I did it so those two would stop fighting. Not that it worked. But I am totally hotter than you. And I guess I also did it for the cookies..." I told Ella.

"What makes you think you're hotter than me? I say we shut up now though to watch our boys fight. Now that's hot..." Ella said.

"Fair enough. But I still don't want to watch this crap that is American Idol. And there are kids in the room so I would advise you to shut up about how hot our boys are fighting unless you want some awkward questions from Angel..."

"Shhh! I'm watching the fight!" Ella said. I turned around to see Fang and Iggy arguing. Oh well, there are worse ways to spend your last 10 minutes of freedom. American Idol is scary.

"Max is definitely fitter! I mean she's naturally hot, it's in her blood! And those battle scars, God! She can kick ass... You know she's fit when she does - you've seen it for yourself," Fang shouted.

"Actually I haven't seen her supposedly kicking ass. I'm blind in case you didn't notice," Iggy responded.

"Smart ass," Fang muttered under his breath.

"Good one Ig!" laughed Gazzy from the arm chair. The whole flock had somehow been persuaded to watch and my Mom was in the other room making popcorn for us. 4 more minutes of freedom...

"Well Max is hotter."

"Tell you what, let's take it in turns giving one reason each why our girlfriend is hotter or whatever, and whoever runs out first loses."

Great. Now they were competing again.

"You go first," Fang said.

"Ella has amazing hair. It's all shiny and soft and a really deep chocolatey brown."

"Max can fly."

"Ella has great eyes and when you look into them you can see your reflection." So Iggy has a portable mirror. He's so vain...

"Max can take out Erasers with one punch."

"Ella gives awesome hugs. You want to just stay in her arms forever." Iggy gave Ella a massive smile. She was practically fainting.

"Max can breathe under water. And she can still kick ass underwater."

"Ella is a total romantic I think that's so sweet."

"Max is really cute when she sleeps." A sentimental answer? Wow!

"Ella has incredible legs. They go on forever."

"I can have an intelligent conversation with Max. We don't have to make out all the time."

"Ella is a great kisser."

"Well Max is good in-" Fang looked over his shoulder at that point and winked at me. "Tell you what Ig I think we should continue this a bit later. I don't want to have to wash Angel's ears out."

Angel was lying on her tummy on the floor talking to Total.

"I still don't understand why we can't watch the wonderful documentary on the history of oysters tonight. I mean no one really wants to watch this awful show do they?" Total asked.

"Watch Max's face really carefully. Then you'll understand why we're all doing this," Angel replied and smiled at me.

Nudge was glued to the TV watching the adverts and making notes of everything she wanted to buy.

"So I'm thinking that eyeshadow in blue and the liner in silver... And then that foundation that I saw in Seventeen earlier... And that jacket! If I remember it right it's from Forever 21 and then- OMG I LOVE THE LOOK OF THAT PERFUME! Now that's going on the list..." She was talking to herself.

At that moment my Mom walked in with a load of popcorn. Everyone was at the door in a flash. I got there first though, grabbed my popcorn (which I was sharing with Fang) and went back to the sofa where I resumed my snuggling.

The show was nearly on. The sponsor ad came up. (A/N I have never watched American Idol btw - I'm British. We watch X Factor which I'm basing it off. So sorry if this is all wrong.)

We weren't expecting it. The show had got a new sponsor since the last series. I guess the voice had been trying to tell me something.

"...and now we present you American Idol. Sponsored by Itex."

Everyone was silent. No one moved apart from Ella who hadn't noticed and started humming the theme tune.

"Ella shut up," I said.

"Nope. You can't stop me!" she replied cheerfully.

"Els seriously. Shut up." Iggy said.

Ella turned around. "Why is everyone so quiet? This is weird guys, come on..." she said

"Ella," I said slowly, "Do you remember Itex? The people we were on the run from. The ones we thought we'd taken down. The people who wanted to kill us. And they're sponsoring American Idol."

Ella's jaw dropped. "So what does this mean? Do you reckon they'll come and try and get you guys again or what? Or, or, I don't know?" Ella burst into tears.

Iggy went and put his arm around her and she started to cry even more into his t-shirt.

"Guys, I think we should watch the rest of the show and take it from there. We can probably get a link to Itex's new website from the American Idol one so we can start to research what's happened. So let's just watch."

Everyone went back to watching as the presenter (some guy I probably should've heard of but haven't) introduced the judges.

Just then Gazzy let off a massive fart. It turned the whole room into a green stinky fog.

"Ugh Gaz! Why now? I wanted to see the judges! I was really looking forward to it coz y'know I'd never seen then before coz I couldn't be bothered to google it and well-"

Someone slapped a hand over Nudge's mouth. Thank God. Then we heard a voice that stuck out over the others. One of the judges I assumed.

"...I want this year's winner to be someone different and new. Someone unique and most of all someone I can make money off... Joking!" the mysterious voice said. I thought I'd heard it before.

"Hey I swear I know that voice!" Iggy said.

"I know; me too. I can't work out who it is but it's not good..." I said.

"You should recognize my voice by now Max, you hear it all the time..."

It was the voice. And then I twigged. My mind cleared. The mist cleared. We could see the TV again. And we knew the face. We knew the name displayed under his picture too although it wasn't what we knew him by. Who didn't know that name even if they were an old granny with no TV?

"Guys. Jeb is Simon Cowell," I said. Then I fainted.

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**Cat and Els xxx**

**A/N I Review please! **


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